It’s the only one in the whole of wild and windy west Wales, in fact, the only one in the whole blinkin’ country, and you’ll find it at Tenby Dinosaur Park.
Hang on a minute! What are we talking about here? Well, sir, what we are talking about is…wait for it… Skiddy Cars. You what?! Skiddy Cars?! Yes indeedy, madam, the very fandabidosi Skiddy Cars: Tenby Dinosaur Park’s brand-spanking new ride for 2017.
Addictive but healthy, exhilarating yet safe, it’s a ride you simply never want to end (though it will), a ride you will never want to get off (though you’ll have to, eventually, ‘cos, let’s face it: we all have homes to go to).
A slightly strange, lovely-jubbely mix of kart racing and, ‘er, ski-ing: yes, that’s right: ski-ing. Picture this if you will: the wind in your hair, the sun on your face, an ocean blue track and not a care in the world. You’ll be eyeballs out, foot on the gas, bombing down the straight, then, all of a sudden at the bend…drifting, drifting, drifting, a case of: ‘Whoooaaa! What’s ah’ going on here then, I…ooh, actually I quite like that…no, I blumin’ love it, I do.
And so you’ll be hooked, your troubles will disappear and you’ll be on your own in the hypnotic Skiddy Car world where time stops and your only thoughts are ‘when can I have another go?’ Or, ‘I wish I could fit one of these in my back garden.’
From Formula One champion to complete bumbling novice: everyone will love Skiddy Cars. And we mean, everyone. Oh yeah! Skiddy Cars rule.
But please remember, for safety reasons, whether you are an adult or child, you have to be TALLER THAN 1.3 metres to be allowed to ride on the Skiddy Cars. That applies to EVERYONE. NO exceptions. No way. Not even Her Majesty the Queen, or Prince Philip. Not even president Putin of Russia with all his roubles. Not even Miss Beyonce′ or old Mr. Ogmore-Pritchard who gives us raspberry cream turnovers for free. Not even him.